Money vs. Impact: The Shift That Changed Everything
We're diving deep into the world of real estate and personal growth today, and it's a wild ride! Our guest, Brad, has hustled his way to closing over 4,000 homes, but he's also on a mission to help folks tackle their childhood traumas and find true happiness. He spills the tea on how unresolved past issues can mess with your adult life and why it’s super important to face those demons if you wanna thrive. We chat about the impact of parenting styles on kids, the role of technology in our lives, and how just a few hours of the right guidance can flip your life script. So, whether you're a real estate newbie or just looking to level up your mental game, you’re gonna wanna stick around for this one!
From 0 to 4,000 Deals: Brad Chandler’s Wholesaling Secrets
Visit https://www.paynelessflipping.com to learn how to do real estate deals the payneless way!
Diving into the world of real estate, we kick things off with Brad, who's been crushing it since he bought his first house back in 2003. Fast forward 19 years, and he's got 4,000 houses under his belt! He spills the beans on how he transitioned from a full-time job to running a successful real estate business while keeping his personal life in check. We chat about the importance of having a killer team that handles around 300 deals a year, which lets him chill and work just a few hours a week. Spoiler alert: it's all about setting up the right systems and trusting your crew to get things done. Oh, and let’s not forget the magic of virtual assistants - they play a huge role in managing leads and scheduling appointments, but don’t get it twisted; they’re not closing the deals themselves. No way, that’s left to the pros!
As we roll on, we hit the emotional side of things, where Brad opens up about a transformative experience that changed his life. It all started with a Zoom call about helping his son with anxiety, which led him to a powerful session in Park City. Here, he unpacks the baggage from his childhood and how it shaped his adult life. It's a real eye-opener as he talks about how unresolved childhood trauma can mess with your life in ways you never even realized. We dive deep into how these early experiences affect our self-worth and relationships, and how the way we parent can impact our kids. Seriously, it’s like a chain reaction that we all need to be aware of.
By the end, we’re not just talking about real estate; we’re discussing personal growth and the importance of connection. Brad shares insights on how to break free from the past and live a life full of joy and impact. If you’ve ever found yourself stuck in negative thinking or feeling disconnected, this episode is a must-listen. It’s all about finding that freedom and happiness, and trust me, you don’t want to miss out on the wisdom Brad drops throughout our chat!
Takeaways:
- Real estate investing can lead to financial freedom if done right, just like Brad did.
- Having a solid team behind you is crucial for scaling your real estate business successfully.
- Childhood experiences shape our behavior as adults, so addressing trauma can lead to healing.
- Connection with your kids is key; being present can significantly impact their mental health.
- If you want to change your life, it starts with wanting to see things differently.
- Self-love and understanding your past can help you overcome many obstacles in life.
Links referenced in this episode:
Companies mentioned in this episode:
- Express Home Buyers
- Keller Williams
- Gabor Maté
- Larry and Annie Yacht
Transcript
All right, we are live with Investor Thrive.
Speaker A:How you doing, Brad?
Speaker B:I'm awesome.
Speaker B:How are you?
Speaker A:Oh, man, it's a.
Speaker A:I'm doing great.
Speaker A:It's a pleasure to see you today.
Speaker A:It's been a busy day.
Speaker A:How about you?
Speaker A:How's your day been going?
Speaker B:Yeah, it's been great.
Speaker B:It's been great.
Speaker A:Good, good.
Speaker A:Well, hey, I appreciate you coming on my podcast today, the Painless Wholesaling podcast.
Speaker A:And what we do here is we try to shorten the learning curve on how to do deals, how to be wholesalers, how to invest in estate.
Speaker A:And it sounds like you're the perfect guy to have on here.
Speaker A:I mean, you've done tons of deals.
Speaker B:I've done a few.
Speaker A:Okay, well, let's talk about it, man.
Speaker A:So for people that don't know you, give us a short 30 second, I guess, synopsis, idea of who you are.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:I read a book in ninth grade on how to buy real estate with no money down.
Speaker B:And I knew that I always wanted to do real estate because I could make a bunch of money doing it.
Speaker B: ght my first house in July of: Speaker B:Bought six houses in July and August, October.
Speaker B:I came home and told my wife we just had a new baby, that I quit my, my job and I was going to start Express Home Buyers.
Speaker B:And she's like, are you crazy?
Speaker B:And I was like, no, I was like, it'll be fine.
Speaker B:And here we are 19 years later at 4,000 houses, and it's worked out pretty well.
Speaker A:Oh, my gosh.
Speaker A:And hey, I'm just curious, with doing that much volume, you must have to have an amazing team behind you, right?
Speaker A:Or were you doing this all, you know, with like a couple people?
Speaker B:No, no, no.
Speaker B:We have an amazing team and it's so amazing to the point where we're going to do probably 300 deals this year and I work about three hours a week in the business.
Speaker A:Wow.
Speaker A:And so you've, you've placed the right people in the right positions to pretty much take over the whole thing, huh?
Speaker B:Yeah, it took me a while.
Speaker B:I mean, we didn't always have a perfect team, but we've got it.
Speaker B:We've got a great team.
Speaker A:Now, what is just curious, what does a structure like that, that can do that kind of volume look like?
Speaker A:Like how many people are needed to do those many deals?
Speaker B:So we have five or six people on our acquisition team and then, you know, some accounting, finance, probably three, four people on construction, slash disposition.
Speaker B:And then we have about 12 or 13 full time virtual assistants.
Speaker A:Okay, so virtual assistants are key in this model, right?
Speaker A:Like getting, I'm assuming, pulling the list, like lead gen, doing a lot of that stuff.
Speaker B:They, they don't do anything on the marketing or lead gen side.
Speaker B:They just handle the leads and call back and, and process everything.
Speaker A:Wow.
Speaker A:Okay, but they're, they're not the acquisitions closers, are they?
Speaker B:No.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker B:No, but, but, but they will set appointments.
Speaker B:Yeah, they'll set appointments.
Speaker A:So lead, they're the leads managers of your companies.
Speaker A:Just like you know, initially getting the interest and setting up appointments.
Speaker B:So they're more overflow, Nathan.
Speaker B:So they'll like, if no one answers on our, our staff or it's after hours or something, they'll, they'll, they'll.
Speaker B:Rather than take it up, you know, a message or whatever, they'll actually set the appointment.
Speaker A:Got it.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:Wow.
Speaker A:You know, and we probably could just talk all day about how the business is split up.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And that might be a call for another time.
Speaker A:But let's talk about something that it seems like from just what we've talked about recently, you're super passionate about.
Speaker A:Can you kind of go into like that story and tell people what's going on with that?
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:So 20 months ago, trying to get my help, my son helped for anxiety.
Speaker B:I was on a zoom call and the lady said, you have a tick, like the first five minutes.
Speaker B:I was like, what are you talking about?
Speaker B:She goes, you blink profusely when you talk about your childhood trauma.
Speaker B:Would you like to come out and work with us?
Speaker B:Because your son's problems probably are cause.
Speaker B:You may be a cause of your son's problems.
Speaker B:So I went out and for a weekend flew to Park City and worked with her and her ex Navy SEAL husband.
Speaker B:And they changed my life.
Speaker B:I mean, really, it wasn't even a weekend, it was like a three hour session.
Speaker B:I came out of there just a completely different human being.
Speaker B:And we just went back to my childhood and figured out the stresses and the traumas and the stories that we as human beings tell ourselves around those traumas to get us through that service at the time when we're six years old.
Speaker B:But when you're 47 years old telling yourself you're no good and you can't do this and you can't do that, and you're not smart enough, whatever it is, you're not good enough, it doesn't serve you.
Speaker B:And it's the cause of most problems in this world, whether it's addictions or relationships, divorces, obesity, all go back to how we feel about ourselves.
Speaker B:And it's all from childhood.
Speaker B:So my life changed so dramatically and so amazingly that I've now dedicated the rest of my life to helping people find the same freedom and happiness that I found.
Speaker A:Wow.
Speaker A:So those two people you met in Park City, I don't know if you knew this, but I live in Salt Lake City, so I'm pretty close.
Speaker A:Do you mind sharing who they were?
Speaker B:It's Larry and Annie Yacht.
Speaker A:Wow.
Speaker A:So ex Navy seal, huh?
Speaker B:Yep.
Speaker A:Did a lot of what he had to say contribute to his ex Navy seal, like, being in the.
Speaker A:I guess, in that position.
Speaker A:Did that contribute to, like, his mindset and why he believed that and taught you, or did that.
Speaker A:Is it just a different thing?
Speaker B:No, I think he's just a really sharp, smart individual, and he just.
Speaker B:He figured this out over the years working with people.
Speaker B:He worked with a lot of CEOs, and he'd come into their companies to help them, and he's like, wait, the problem isn't with your company.
Speaker B:The problem is how you think.
Speaker B:So he literally designed this around that.
Speaker B:If your business, I mean, if anything is in chaos in your life, whether it's you don't go to the gym, or you weigh too much, or your marriage sucks, or your business is in chaos, or, you know, always up and down starving for cash, you've got to look at, why is that happening?
Speaker B:You got to go to the source of the problem.
Speaker B:The source of the problem is typically.
Speaker B:Always happens between birth and 10 years old, where your brain is programmed and people are like, how can that be?
Speaker B:Well, your subconscious mind never forgets anything.
Speaker B:And your subconscious mind is what rules 80 to 90% of your behavior on a daily basis.
Speaker B:A daily basis.
Speaker B:So you're doing all this behavior and activity, and most people don't even know why they're doing it.
Speaker B:They're driven by this programming from when they were six years old.
Speaker A:Well, I mean, that kind of makes me feel like if everything has to go between your birth and 10 years old, then maybe people should focus more on figuring out what happened in that time.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:Well, they should.
Speaker B:Again, it's the cause of.
Speaker B:I can pretty much trace anything bad in anyone's life probably back to that time period of life where their brain was being formed.
Speaker A:Wow.
Speaker A:So.
Speaker A:So I watched a podcast with Joe Rogan.
Speaker A:I think he had a medical expert on there and how he was saying that, like, a lot of the ADHD and a lot of these problems stem from, like, the way you were raised.
Speaker A:In that time period and living, I guess, in anxiety.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:Like is, do you, is that something that you've even heard of or.
Speaker B:This is, I've got.
Speaker B:This is likely the guy.
Speaker B:Gabriel.
Speaker A:That's him.
Speaker A:Yeah, Gabriel.
Speaker A:He's the man, dude.
Speaker B:He's a man.
Speaker B:He's one of my mentors.
Speaker B:I studied under him.
Speaker A:No way.
Speaker A:That guy, that guy was just a genius.
Speaker B:Incredible.
Speaker B:So here's, here's what he says.
Speaker B:This is a 600 page book.
Speaker B:I just showed you 600 pages of saying that every health disease can be traced back to childhood, unresolved childhood trauma and adhd.
Speaker B:Let's just use as an example.
Speaker B:ADHD is a child's mind saying something's really bad happened to me at 6.
Speaker B:So what do I do?
Speaker B:Your brain does what it's supposed to do.
Speaker B:It checks out, it disassociates.
Speaker B:So then nothing ever changes because your subconscious brain doesn't know time.
Speaker B:Right?
Speaker B:So at 17 or 27 or whatever it is, you're still disassociating.
Speaker B:So there's no.
Speaker B:He, he, he claims, and he's a doctor, he's been doing this for 40 years, that, that there's no such thing as ADD or ADHD.
Speaker B:And you don't need medication because it never solves anything.
Speaker B:It is a disease of childhood that all you have to do is go back and figure out when it started and reprogram your mind around the truth and not the untruth.
Speaker B:So amazing you saw that.
Speaker B:Because this guy is, he is, he is so great.
Speaker B:Cancer, MS, eczema, like on and on and on things are.
Speaker B:When your body is under stress for a long time, it breaks down physically and that's why illnesses occur.
Speaker A:So let's, let's talk about that.
Speaker A:So obviously if I, if I have a.
Speaker A:I don't have any kids, right?
Speaker A:But if I, when I have a kid, from what Gabriel was saying, from what I understood was you need to be attentive, you need to be present with your children, you need to be there to, to, I guess, support them.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And if you don't, then there's that stress level.
Speaker A:Is that correct?
Speaker A:Is that like you need to spend more time with the people you love, especially in that 1 to 10 age range?
Speaker B:Yeah, I do a daily video every single day.
Speaker B:And one of the videos that got the most views was quoting him that basically said every problem in a person's life and every suffering can be down to the unmet, can be traced back to unmet childhood needs.
Speaker B:So a lot of people, when they Think about trauma.
Speaker B:They're like, well, I wasn't bullied by my neighbor.
Speaker B:I wasn't molested.
Speaker B:I wasn't sexually assaulted.
Speaker B:Well, that's a big T trauma.
Speaker B:This is his words.
Speaker B:Little T trauma is you can be completely messed up.
Speaker B:The rest of your little sister was born.
Speaker B:You thought your parents loved her more than you, so.
Speaker B:Absolutely, 100% he's right.
Speaker A:Shoot.
Speaker A:So is that.
Speaker A:Do you have.
Speaker B:If you're.
Speaker B:If you're met.
Speaker B:It doesn't have to be huge.
Speaker B:It can be.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Do you have kids in that age right now?
Speaker B:I have kids, Yep.
Speaker A:Okay.
Speaker A:Is that.
Speaker A:Is that something.
Speaker B:You're kidding.
Speaker A:Sorry.
Speaker A:Go ahead.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker B:So the reason my son has.
Speaker B:The reason my son has anxiety is because the way that I parented him and the way that his mother parented him before I made this transformation.
Speaker B:So, yeah, I was.
Speaker B:I've been a single dad for 11 years.
Speaker B:I did everything for my son, everything for my son and daughter.
Speaker B:But yet, even though I was attentive and loving and affectionate, my childhood pain was putting undue pressure on him to be, like a worst golfer.
Speaker B:And that gave him anxiety.
Speaker A:Shoot, that's wild, man.
Speaker A:This has given me a lot to think about.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:With raising children and also addressing your past, anybody's past, child traumas.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:Nathan.
Speaker B:I mean, the thing about children that's really important is if you are listening to this and your children or child have behavioral issues, the first place you should look is in the mirror.
Speaker B:Because you 100% are the cause of your.
Speaker B:Your child.
Speaker B:100% may be a stretch.
Speaker B:99%, 98%.
Speaker B:If your child has behavioral issues, it's because of you.
Speaker B:And Gabor wrote a book with his son, who's also in the business.
Speaker B:It's called don't lose hold of your child or something like that.
Speaker B:Keep your child.
Speaker B:And it's all about how every behavioral problem that a child has is around lack of connection with their parent.
Speaker B:And punishments do no good, like hitting a child.
Speaker B:Oh, my God.
Speaker B:The worst thing you could ever do.
Speaker B:People are like, oh, you need to spank your kid just so they'll respect you.
Speaker B:No, no, no, no, no.
Speaker B:That's the worst thing you can ever do, because the one person in that child's life that's supposed to protect them, they're going to inflict harm, violence, and shame on that child.
Speaker B:And that's going to fix the child.
Speaker B:That's going to help them.
Speaker B:No, that's going to screw the child up.
Speaker B:So if you're spanking your children Thinking you're doing something good, you're definitely not.
Speaker A:Oh my gosh.
Speaker A:Well, what's your opinion on the way society is right now and how, how people are very like distracted right now with technology and not really being present?
Speaker A:Do you feel like there's going to be more issues with kids growing up in this day and age?
Speaker B:There are more issues, not are there going to be.
Speaker B:I mean, the 15 to 25 year old age range is the probably the most troubled 10 year age range that exists right now.
Speaker B:And it's because of the devices, it's because of lack of connection.
Speaker B:So all of our problems when we have that childhood trauma, all it's really doing is taking us out of connection with ourselves.
Speaker B:So lack of connection with yourself is terrible.
Speaker B:Lack of connection with other people is terrible.
Speaker B:So the fact that you can now order food from your house, work from home, get your laundry done, you never have to leave, right?
Speaker B:So it's creating a further disconnection.
Speaker B:And then the technology of these phones is they want to keep you constantly there, so they do things to keep your brain constantly.
Speaker B:Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go.
Speaker B:Your brain was supposed to be in, go back to a thousand years ago when we were living on the plains or in caves even further back.
Speaker B:There wasn't danger all the time.
Speaker B:You would stay around, you'd go hunt, you'd have like 20% where your brain is in an active state like a fight or flight, and 80% the other time it's reversed.
Speaker B:Now it's like most human beings spend 80% of time in like this super jacked up fight or flight mode and it's not good at all.
Speaker A:What's your solution?
Speaker B:The solution is connection.
Speaker B:The solution to everything is take a look at your childhood and figure out those traumatic times you went through and then reverse those faults and turn them into the truth and live by the truth.
Speaker B:For children, it's getting outside, it's having their parents listen to them.
Speaker B:Gabor says the child has to be seen, heard and understood.
Speaker B:So if you're a parent, you should be doing that.
Speaker B:You should be forcing your kids to get, get out of the house, off of their gaming, into nature, into sports, into biking, whatever it is, just get out of the house and connect with other human beings.
Speaker A:Shoot.
Speaker A:Well, do you feel like moving to a remote area where there's bad service and you know, they have to go out in the woods?
Speaker A:Do you feel like that's a good idea?
Speaker B:I mean, I don't know about that.
Speaker B:That might, that might be a little Extreme.
Speaker A:Well, I'll tell you this.
Speaker A:My wife is from Canada and she's two hours north of Toronto.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:And whenever I go there, it's like my happiest time.
Speaker A:They live in, like, what's called cottage country.
Speaker A:It's like out in the middle of, you know, the fields, and it's just so fun, you know, everybody there is just like, slower pace.
Speaker A:They're just enjoying their ice rink hockey, you know, that.
Speaker A:The homemade stuff.
Speaker A:It just seems like connection is more important there.
Speaker A:And then in Salt Lake City, Utah or wherever, when you go in cities, it's like boom, boom, boom, boom.
Speaker A:You know, it's.
Speaker A:It's just a go, go, go.
Speaker A:So are you saying that the lifestyle, maybe even capitalism that's driving this is going to be a bad.
Speaker A:It's just too much.
Speaker B:So look, I think that if people got the right help, I mean, you can.
Speaker B:It's.
Speaker B:It's not your environment so much.
Speaker B:It's your thought process, how you think, and then, you know, it's not your outside environment.
Speaker B:It's not what's going on in the city as much as what's going on in your own house.
Speaker B:Are you stuck in your room all day playing video games all day?
Speaker B:Yeah, that's really, really bad.
Speaker B:That can happen in the farm or that can happen in, you know, the Bronx.
Speaker B:It doesn't matter.
Speaker B:So just get out and be with nature and be with people.
Speaker A:So about the child, addressing the childhood trauma, like, how would you suggest someone go about that if they're watching this?
Speaker A:Like, do they reach out to you?
Speaker A:Do they reach out to a therapist?
Speaker A:How does that work?
Speaker B:I mean, either, either, all the above, really.
Speaker B:Just go get someone.
Speaker B:When you look for someone, 83% of Americans identify as not being very happy.
Speaker B:So that probably puts 83% of life coaches and therapists in that same bucket.
Speaker B:Right?
Speaker B:So I would ask them questions around, what does their life look like?
Speaker B:What does their relationships look like?
Speaker B:Have they made the transition?
Speaker B:Are they happy or are they constantly in a fight or flight mode?
Speaker B:Are they constantly stressed?
Speaker B:Do they overeat or do they do drugs?
Speaker B:Are they addicted to something?
Speaker B:So it's really hard finding someone who's done where you're trying to go.
Speaker B:I've made this transition.
Speaker B:I'm as happy and as free as I've ever been in my life.
Speaker B:Life is amazing for me, great relationships.
Speaker B:So certainly people can come to me.
Speaker B:If they don't, though, just know that no matter what situation you're in, if you're suffering, life doesn't have to be about suffering, There is a better way.
Speaker B:And the method that I use is a quick method.
Speaker B:Like I have seen crazy, crazy transformation in a matter of like three or four hours with some of my clients.
Speaker B:You don't need to go to a talk therapist and spend five years doing this.
Speaker B:You just don't need to do it.
Speaker B:There is a better way.
Speaker B:So if you're suffering, know that if you really want to change and you're willing to see things from a different perspective, like your life can radically change in a matter of hours.
Speaker A:Wow.
Speaker A:Do you believe I have adhd?
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:Whether it's figment in my imagination, whatever, how would I conquer that?
Speaker B:So first of all, you should read Gabor's book because he's got an entire book dedicated to it.
Speaker B:Honestly, working with someone like me, because your ADHD is just.
Speaker B:You're in like a fight or flight mode.
Speaker B:So something happened in your childhood, likely that got you to disassociate and get out of the present moment.
Speaker B:And because you haven't done the work to separate yourself from your adult and childlike life, you still live in the past.
Speaker B:That's what trauma does.
Speaker B:It takes you out of the present and into the past.
Speaker B:So you're living in the past.
Speaker B:So what we do is through this work that I do, we get you into the present.
Speaker B:And that's how true happiness is, Right?
Speaker B:Heaven on earth is right here, right now.
Speaker B:If you're not worried about what's going to happen tomorrow and you're not letting your memory ruin yesterday, then you're happy.
Speaker A:So how much do you think about money now that you've made this transformation?
Speaker A:How much does money is money on your mind?
Speaker B:So way less than it was because money was the vehicle to prove my worth.
Speaker B:So this coaching company that I formed six months ago is the first business venture I've ever started in my life where I didn't think about how am I going to make a ton of money?
Speaker B:My focus now is how do I make a lot of impact?
Speaker B:And that's the same focus I have in my express home buyers fix and flip business.
Speaker B:I've now changed to how can I impact my employees?
Speaker B:How can I impact my sellers?
Speaker B:How can we impact our investors in a positive way?
Speaker B:Instead of focusing on money, I'm focusing on impact.
Speaker B:And we're doing amazing.
Speaker B:So I think if more people would focus on making an impact in people's lives, they would make more money than ever.
Speaker B: ted a Keller Williams team in: Speaker B:So I was focused on the top line.
Speaker B:Why?
Speaker B:Because if I sold a billion dollars, maybe I'd be worthy of something.
Speaker B:Had I.
Speaker B:Had I gone in and said, hey, I'm going to construct the best team with the best service that Keller Williams ever had, I would have had a way better chance of getting to a billion dollars and actually making money than I did trying to shoot for a billion dollars.
Speaker B:It was just silly.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Wow.
Speaker A:So let me ask you this.
Speaker A:If after coming to this realization that you don't, this is what is true happiness, what is the number one thing that you've gotten rid of in your life that you used to do that you feel like has made a giant impact, like a habit or something?
Speaker B:Easy answer.
Speaker B:It's just my thinking.
Speaker B:I started living in the truth.
Speaker B:So for 47 years, my subconscious brain was telling me, you're not worthy.
Speaker B:You've got to go prove yourself.
Speaker B:And I woke up that day in Park City or got off the out of the session and I'm like, wait, wait, I don't have to prove anything to anyone anymore.
Speaker B:Oh my gosh, like a weight just got lifted off my chest.
Speaker B:It was amazing.
Speaker B:So that's the one thing, and that's the one thing that everyone who's suffering does is they don't live in the truth.
Speaker B:They live about these lies about who they are, and that's not who they really are.
Speaker B:Everyone at their essence is an amazing human being.
Speaker B:They may not behave as a mate human being, but the reason they don't behave as an amazing human being is, is because they tell themselves our prisons are full of people.
Speaker B:They weren't born a prisoner.
Speaker B:They weren't born a criminal.
Speaker B:They were born a beautiful child that happened to be corrupted through their parents.
Speaker B:Through their parents poor beliefs.
Speaker A:Well, yeah, I mean, that's.
Speaker A:From what you're saying, it makes complete sense.
Speaker A:Let me ask you, does religion take any part into this equation or is this not religious at all?
Speaker B:So at the core of it, there is no religion involved.
Speaker B:I'm a believer in God.
Speaker B:I've become closer to God through this process.
Speaker B:Do you need to be a believer in God to make this work?
Speaker B:No, I think it's really important to think that there's a universe out there and that there's a higher power of some way, shape or form.
Speaker B:There are more grains of sand on every beach on the Earth.
Speaker B:There are more stars in the sky than grains of sand.
Speaker B:Our universe, you can't even fathom how big it is.
Speaker B:So there's a lot more out there that we don't know and we will never know.
Speaker B:Maybe we will.
Speaker B:But yeah, if you believe in higher power or that there's a greater universe or that there's a greater good going on, it's going to help a lot in your journey.
Speaker A:Is this new knowledge to the, I guess, scientific community or in general that they're one to 10 years old has determines disease, your mindset, all that.
Speaker A:Is that new?
Speaker B:Well, that part, yes.
Speaker B:I'm sorry, that part is, is, I think is newer and newer.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker B:It is the fact that the, the stress, although you know what I say it's newer.
Speaker B:When all the books I've read, people have been talking about this for 60 to 80 years.
Speaker B:It's just, it's never gone anywhere.
Speaker B:Because think about this.
Speaker B:If I go to the doctor, does the doctor ever ask me about, like, well, are you under stress or what was your childhood like?
Speaker B:No, they're like, let's, let's, this is what Western medicine is all about.
Speaker B:Let me label you, diagnose you, and then give you a drug.
Speaker B:So if they can do it through talk therapy, where's the money?
Speaker B:Do you know how much pharmaceutical.
Speaker B:You go and look at every pharmaceutical drug that's out there and 90% plus could be traced back to the stress that you've had from childhood trauma.
Speaker B:So it's one of those things in life where you just have to follow the money trail and you can see why it's not talked about more.
Speaker B:But thanks to Gabor, he's talking about it and he's getting some huge press from his book.
Speaker A:Did Gabor, is that, did he help you along this journey or was it mainly the seal and the lady in Park City?
Speaker B:So I've been fortunate to work under like 3 or 4 of what I think some of the best people in the business.
Speaker B:So he was just one of the people.
Speaker A:Wow.
Speaker A:How'd you, how'd you get linked up with that?
Speaker A:Like, that's, that's a completely different industry than home buying.
Speaker A:Like, is it just a different circle you're running in or how, how did that happen?
Speaker B:I mean, it's just through, like, I, I've probably read 40 books and spend a thousand to 2,000 hours on this since, since my transformation last February.
Speaker B:It's all I do.
Speaker B:It's, it's all I do is, is just trying to become the best so that I can impact and have the biggest impact on the most people.
Speaker A:Do you believe that this is something that the average person can do?
Speaker A:They can change or do you feel like this is like it takes a certain person, like skills, not skill set, but like, I don't know, high level individual to be able to change.
Speaker A:I guess what happened within the last, you know, one to 10 years when they were born.
Speaker B:Here are the only people that can truly change.
Speaker B:Number one, they've got to want to change.
Speaker B:And number two, they have, they have to have a willingness to see things from a different perspective.
Speaker B:So anyone in the world, if they have those two characteristics can change.
Speaker A:Wow.
Speaker A:So it's not, it's not like you, you have to achieve a certain, you know, intelligence or IQ or ability to like do this.
Speaker A:Anybody can do it.
Speaker B:Anybody can do it.
Speaker A:Wow.
Speaker A:You got me thinking.
Speaker A:You know, usually I'm pretty upbeat, but I'm like, you got me.
Speaker A:You probably have this effect on a lot of your people you work, you talk to.
Speaker B:Well, I do.
Speaker B:I mean it gets you thinking, right?
Speaker B:Because the only time you can change is when you have awareness of something and people might be like, well, I don't know what this self love stuff he's talking about, I don't know if I have like compatible.
Speaker B:What does that even mean?
Speaker B:Well, it means just that, it means that you love yourself.
Speaker B:And so many people I talk to say, well I love myself.
Speaker B:And I go, well, do you?
Speaker B:Let's do a little test.
Speaker B:Are you constantly triggered?
Speaker B:Are you constantly in a state of like anger, depression?
Speaker B:Do you find yourself judging people all the time?
Speaker B:Do you judge yourself all the time?
Speaker B:Do you have self destructive behaviors?
Speaker B:Do you eat too much, drink too much, smoke too much?
Speaker B:What are your relationships like?
Speaker B:Are you in a deeply connected relationship or have you gone from are you in a shitty relationship?
Speaker B:And is every relationship been like boom boom bo boom.
Speaker B:If you answer yes to any of those questions, you have some component of lacking self love and self compassion.
Speaker B:And if that's the case, every area of your life is negatively affected.
Speaker A:Wow.
Speaker A:You know, because I think about my childhood like just, you know, like most people, I would assume that their parents tried their best, but they weren't the best.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:Like it just happens.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:They neglect hitting or whatever it happens.
Speaker A:But I thought, you know, just before talking, I just thought that was life and you just got a man up and just go through and do your best.
Speaker A:And I have no ill will towards the parents.
Speaker A:I think they're amazing.
Speaker A:But I mean if you're talking about issues from 1 to 10, then I'm assuming I have quite a bit like anybody else.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:And again, so, so I would Once we're off the call, I would just look at your, look at your life and look at all the things that didn't go right.
Speaker B:Relationships, your health, your, you know, how are you in a day?
Speaker B:Are you, are you upset?
Speaker B:Do you get trigger a lot?
Speaker B:All of those things will be sign that you have, you have work to do.
Speaker B:And if you're willing to do the work, the other side of where you're at is, is magical.
Speaker B:Absolutely magical.
Speaker A:Well, I'm curious, who doesn't need work?
Speaker A:I mean, who have you ever met that hasn't had something crazy happen in that 10 year span?
Speaker A:I mean, it's not going to, it's going to happen, right?
Speaker A:So like, is it.
Speaker A:Do you feel like there's some people that are just like had the best parents, best situation?
Speaker A:They're fine.
Speaker B:I mean, look, of the hundreds of people I've talked to, ironically, I just had a session with my business partner earlier today and I couldn't find anything.
Speaker B:I couldn't find anything.
Speaker B:But how many people is that, Nathan?
Speaker B:It is such a small percentage.
Speaker B:I mean a fraction of a small percentage.
Speaker B:So who could use it?
Speaker B:Pretty much everyone.
Speaker A:Yeah, well, it sounds like it because I just know from my experience and from friends experience, like it's, it's just life gives you curve balls, right?
Speaker A:To your parents, your friends, your family.
Speaker A:And if you're raised in that kind of environment and you just brush it off because you're like, that's just life.
Speaker A:I mean from what you're saying, it sounds like you can still overcome, you can overcome those issues that you probably buried.
Speaker B:There's no brushing off anything by the way, Nathan.
Speaker B:You may think you brushed it off, but all you have to look at is again, look at your relationships and your success in life.
Speaker B:Not success from a financial standpoint.
Speaker B:Success to me is do you wake up in the morning feeling good about life?
Speaker B:Do you go to, do you, do you put your head on the pillow at night feeling good about life?
Speaker B:Or you constantly stress, are you constantly angry, are you beating yourself up?
Speaker B:Negative self talk, any of that stuff will.
Speaker B:You haven't kicked, you can't push anything aside.
Speaker B:That's the thing.
Speaker B:Suck it up.
Speaker B:Nah, that doesn't work.
Speaker A:Wow, you got a lot of good stuff to tell.
Speaker A:I mean, I'm sure I don't.
Speaker A:Honestly, I'm just trying to think.
Speaker A:I'm like, what could he do tell you to, to change your, your, your trauma or not even trauma, but like what has happened that might be affecting you negatively?
Speaker A:I have no idea.
Speaker A:But it sounds interesting.
Speaker A:I think we gotta talk more.
Speaker B:Love it, man.
Speaker B:I'm.
Speaker B:I'm always here.
Speaker A:All right, let's go.
Speaker A:Well, hey, everybody.
Speaker A:This has been amazing.
Speaker A:If you have, you know, anything you want to work on with yourself.
Speaker A:I mean, I believe that mindset and self development is the mo.
Speaker A:One of the most.
Speaker A:It's something I'm extremely passionate about.
Speaker A:So when you're talking about gay war and all that stuff, like, I think it's amazing.
Speaker A:I want to be a better father once I have children.
Speaker A:I want to be able to provide and be, you know, to avoid these issues that are obviously causing a lot of problems for people.
Speaker A:So I appreciate you coming on.
Speaker A:Is there anything you'd like to say before we wrap up?
Speaker B:No, just.
Speaker B:I put out a daily video on freedom and happiness, and I'm on all the social media platforms and all of my links are@bradchandler.com contact.
Speaker B:So just go follow me, and if I can help you in any way, my phone number's on there.
Speaker B:You don't have to suffer one second, one hour longer.
Speaker B:If it's not me, I'll get you someone else that can help you.
Speaker A:Powerful, powerful message.
Speaker A:Well, thank you so much, Brad.
Speaker A:Thanks for coming on.
Speaker B:Thank you.
